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Eltro2kneo
Python coder and pixel artist with neither sanity nor happiness.
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Elt Bicky @Eltro2kneo

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The "rules of the internet" are fake and childish

Posted by Eltro2kneo - July 6th, 2010


For those who are familiar with "the rules of the internet", I'm here to tell all of you why is it fake and childish by reading every rule and write commentaries beneath.

But before I start, "the rules of the internet" were only written by an uneducated child who only jerks off to porn in a daily bases and chain messaged this abomination of text to everyone to actually believe this fallacy. A lot of these rules are very stupid, pointless and have no connection to the real meaning and main purpose of the internet that all of these childish rules are not real and must not be used for many reasons.

I'll tell you this once and I wont repeat. The internet was not made just for porn you childish sick fucks, it was made for large sources of information and media. And no, it doesn't have "80% porn" that is overestimating the amount with only the number of hits it has.

The entire internet has 2 Billion websites and pornography only has 50 Million. That's nothing near 80% of the internet, children, instead that's 2% of the internet. Ironic, don't you think? I say that's pathetic compared those 2 Billion.

So without further a due, I'm going to review these pathetic nonexistent rules you speak of:

1: Do not talk about /b/.
And what happens if we talk about /b/? Nothing, the subject about Anonymous people is very interesting. Don't tell me you got this "/b/" from a chan site.

2: Do NOT talk about /b/.
You already have this rule, it's pointless to repeat it.

3: We are Anonymous.
Not everyone who use the internet is an anonymous, we all have names for profiles. How can this be a rule, it doesn't pose anything to be a rule at all. We are Ermac.

4: Anonymous are legion.
Another rule that's not even a rule, just another description about Anonymous people, which contradicts rules 1 and 2.

5: Anonymous never forgives.
Yet another rule that describes the anonymous, this one is a bit more of a rule than the previous ones. However, this rule only corrupts the behavior of a human, so it must not be tolerated.

6: Anonymous can be a horrible, senseless, uncaring monster.
It's possible for someone to be an asshole, but you shouldn't, it only corrupts you.

7: Anonymous is still able to deliver.
Not all sites an anonymous can deliver in.

8: There are no real rules about posting.
As long as there are no administrators. But there are no real rules for the internet either.

9: There are no real rules about moderation either -enjoy your ban.
Wow a rule that contradicts itself in saying "Enjoy your ban", where you can actually get banned and there are rules.

10: If you enjoy any rival sites - DON'T.
It's unwise to have rules that control your way of liking.

11: All your carefully picked arguments can easily be ignored.
That's not completely true, you can pick any argument you'd like without being ignored.

12: Anything you say can be used against you.
This only occurs in an argument with a troll not with everyone else.

13: Anything you say can be turn into something else - fixed
Only in Wiki sites and editable sites, nowhere else.

14: Do not argue with trolls - it means that they win.
Trolls are nothing but people who want attention and negative responses. You must identify the troll before arguing.

15: The harder you try, the harder you will fail.
Definitely a false moral. When you try hard enough, it will increase the chances of success, like the word "definitely" I was trying to spell it right as hard as I could until I succeeded.

16: If you fail in epic proportions, it may just become a winning failure.
This however, makes no sense. How can some one fail and win a fail?

17: Every win fails eventually
If it gets beaten by something bigger or its new stuff is incompatible that is.

18: Everything that can be labeled can be hated.
You mean like a shitty movie with "good anime" label? Saw that in Dragon Ball Evolution.

19: The more you hate it, the stronger it gets.
This is really not true, when something is severely hated, it loses support, it doesn't gain it from the haters, it's only gained from the fans.

20: Nothing is to be taking seriously.
Oh, you mean like these rules? Wow, that really kills it. But seriously (LOL), there's a lot of things to be taken seriously, like internet news, relevant information, big companies, site property, viruses, etc.

21: Original content is original only for a few seconds before getting old.
This tells me that whoever wrote this, lacked patience.

22: Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality.
Cut n' paste is only made for cloning the same information, not for ridiculous shit like this.

23: Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality.
Did you have to repeat?

24: Every repost is always a repost of a repost.
This one is trying to be funny, but it's not. It's not true either. Not always a repost of a repost, it rarely happens.

25: Relation to the original topic decreases with every post.
That's if you change the subject. The number of post does not affect the post relativity.

26: Any topic can be easily turned into something totally unrelated.
A topic is unrelated? To what? This rule is missing something.

27: Always question a person's sexual prefrences without any real reason.
This is unnecessary, why do something for no reason? I also noted that this kid doesn't know how to spell "preferences" right.

28: Always question a person's gender - just in case it's really a man.
Why question someone's gender? That has no relevance at all.

29: In the internet all girls are men and all kids are undercover FBI agents.
How pathetic, using infinity-type words (Every, All, None, Always, Never) does not make this rule valid.

30: There are no girls on the internet.
This is completely not true, I have friends that are girls and have Face Book accounts.

31: TITS or GTFO - the choice is yours.
Very pathetic, there are thousands of other things in the internet than just pornography you inept child who refuses to look at anything else but porn.

32: You must have pictures to prove your statements.
You must also have common sense to judge your statements properly. And your childish rules are just text. However, pictures only apply in evidential discussions.

33: Lurk more - it's never enough.
This only downgrades your physical attributes and it's unhealthy to be in front of the screen 24/7 without any short break from it. Although you learn a lot of relevance from the internet if you don't waste it all on one thing, porn.

Of course, the most famous Rule34: There is no porn of it, no exceptions.
This rule claims to have any connection with the main purpose of the internet, yet it fails drastically resulting in uneducated fappers that only use the internet for the most irrelevant source ever known, porn. No porn is necessary for a certain franchise, honestly. So don't be forced by these pathetic rules that a child made.

35: If no porn is found at the moment, it will be made.
Another pathetic rule that is really unnecessary to follow. You don't need to make porn if there's none of it at the time. This rule only applies to porn sites, which take 2% of the entire internet. O' the sweet irony for these porn fags.

36: There will always be even more fucked up shit than what you just saw.
Fucked up shit I just saw? You mean THESE RULES? Another thing that kills it. So far this childish "rules of the internet" bullshit really laughs at itself.

37: You cannot divide by zero (just because the calculator says so)
What does this have anything to do with the internet? None

38: No real limits of any kind apply here - not even the sky
The only thing limitless in the internet is its data storage, nothing else, and what sky?

39: CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
No. All caps is only considered yelling, that's not cool.

40: EVEN WITH CRUISE CONTROL YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER
Steer what?

41: Desu isn't funny. Seriously guys. It's worse than Chuck Norris jokes.
Desu has nothing related to the internet, so that makes this rule completely invalid

42: Nothing is sacred.
Yet another invalid rule? So far, these "rules" are not important rules at all.

43: The more beautiful and pure a thing is - the more satisfying it is to corrupt it.
This only increases the number of pointless trolls.

44: Even one positive comment about Japanese things can make you a weeaboo.
Positive Japanese things do not make you a wapanese unless you want to be a Japanese yourself. This is also a sign of discrimination

45: When one sees a lion, one must get into the car
*sigh* When one writes a rule set for the internet, ONE MUST MAKE ALL THE RULES APPLY TO THE FUCKING INTERNET AND NOTHING OFF TOPIC YOU CHILDISH PORNO FAG!!!

46: There is always furry porn of it.
Not true, not always.

47: The pool is always closed.
Congratulations porn-fag child, you have made the STUPIDEST RULES FOR THE INTERNET EVER MADE AND CHAIN MESSAGED. End of story.

What's the final results for these pathetic childish rules that are nonexistent?
1: Unnecessary
2: Stupid
3: Redundant
4: Irrelevant
5: Obviously fake and not real for how ridiculous they are.

When you see these rules or one of them, please avoid them at all costs as they have no logical reasoning and are only made by a kid who lives in a basement watching nothing but porn and refuses to watch something else and can't understand the real purpose of the internet.

Because the truth is, there are no rules in the internet, you can make whatever website you want and add whatever rules you want to your own site. You don't need a retard to govern the internet with these stupid rules at the top, because they're meaningless.

So do what ever you want and make any website you want.


Comments

WHY SO SERIOUS

Who called in the Joker?